A best friend is undoubtedly one of the best gifts from God you can receive. They love you unconditionally and don’t care whether you’re beautiful or hippy or rich. All it matters is that your hearts fall for each other, your souls interconnect every fibre of their being and the very touch of their warmth, whether they hold your hand or just sit beside you, can wash away your fears and anxiety because they are someone you can spill out your inner dark secrets to. When you can’t express them to your mother out of fear of what she may wonder of the working of your mind, or you don’t have a sister to share it with, a best friend fills in the void and just the caressing question and statements of ‘What’s wrong?’ or ‘Spill it’ or ‘Okay, I’m listening’ gets you to open the gates and the words come pouring out.
We all have best friends. They enter your life to stay permanent and when they promise they’ll always be there for you no matter what, they absolutely mean it. They hail from school, or college, or your neighbour, or even your blogger friend.
Your best friend can be God as well.
He is the ultimate best friend you can get. For me, that best friend is Lord Krishna. The difference between the divine best friend and the human best friend is that, you have to either speak or text or email to spill out your happiness or angst to the latter. But with the Lord, all you need is feelings and your conscience. He knows what you’re thinking. He knows what you want. He knows every single deep dark desire lurking within you, stuff you can’t admit even to yourselves, let alone your human best friend.
I love talking to Lord Krishna. The beautiful baby portrait of Him hanging on my wall smiles angelically at me every morning I wake up and open my eyes. It’s lovely to wish Him good morning and them hum myself through my morning routine. While I write my book, I get all sorts of confusions pertaining to the actions and emotions of my characters and when I put forth the questions to my mind, I instead ask Him. He just sits there, smiling at me, watching me go crazy. I pull all sorts of faces as I rant non-stop to Him – only in my mind voice – and when I finally get to a conclusion, I happily begin writing again with the satisfied mind someone paid attention to my insanity with nothing but love. And I always know the inner voice that speaks up rarely was a message from Him. Trust Him blindly by associating every single sane reaction within you to Him, nothing can ever harm you or hoodwink you. You begin trusting yourself more that way, becoming more healthy.
God’s always my best friend.
Now coming to my other best friends. These girls are like my own sisters.
I don’t have a sister by blood and I’ve always felt sad by that back during my tween years. I was never the kind of kid people considered cool and felt like wanting to hang around all the time. I’ve always been the lone desk girl watching everyone else throw back their heads and laugh at something they never tell me. It’s frustrating. I had awful socialising skills back during childhood. I was this quiet dorky little girl with a blank mind.
I was separated from my mother for three years. She, Dad and my brother were in the United Kingdom while I came to India to live with my maternal grandparents to enrol at school here. They wanted to see how I coped up because we were planning to move back here as a family. So there I was, a tiny ten year old thrown into an entirely new environment with no clue of what was happening around me. All I kept thinking was that I missed my mother hugely and I couldn’t quite fit in well. The nights witnessed me crying into my pillow unknown to my grandparents. There were only a few girls who didn’t think I was weird, one of them a bestie who looked after me well. I couldn’t get in tune with the other girls at all, no matter how much I wanted to. I wanted to be cool. I wanted to be with the sassy girls. I wanted to show that not all Indian girls from abroad should be chic like the whole school envisioned me to be. I didn’t connect with anyone soulfully at all.
I survived five years there and then after my parents came back to settle in India permanently, we moved to a new city and I found myself new friends. We were this little gang, all composed of new students who came to pursue high school education here. I love those nutcrackers and we still keep in touch, especially through this Whatsapp Group. But I can’t say I am extremely close with anyone. However, I had a vast improvement in my socialising skills and I was able to talk to people more easily without getting intimidated by their mere presence. My shyness still persisted though, which proved to be a hindrance in other unlikely circumstances I’m better off not mentioning. This is school number eleven.
Then as my Dad got a transfer, we changed cities again, and I enrolled in school number twelve. I missed my nutcracker gang terribly. It was quite hard for me to find new friends, because I still kept thinking about all the silly things we do every day and the way I look forward to going to school just because we’re all together. In the new place, I was welcomed warmly by all the girls and it was quite encouraging but I took some time settling down.
And this is the environment where I found out who I was.
This is where I found out that I am actually a writer and that I needed to find girls that are bookworms. Girls that adore the same things I do. Girls that text in proper English sentences. Girls who are actually introverts. Girls who become extroverts when talking to me, which should happen vice versa. You can say I found out my true intellect and discovered the way I should filter through the mixture of personalities to find my perfect buddy.
And I found three of them there. Their bonds with me taught me all the things I’m supposed to do. Their bonds gave me a clear insight of where I’m going and that all of my passion locked within is going to be angry if I don’t act on them, because those passions are who I am. I am an author, Deepika Ishwarya, who loves writing, who loves reading, who doesn’t hesitate to express immense passion over anything or anyone she loves or is inspired by. These girls are like my family. They brought the real me out of me. I don’t need to be cool. I don’t need to be a hipster. I don’t need to be updated about all of the latest gossip. That’s the opposite of who I am.
What I need to be is that I need to be me. I have my own style and look. I have my own ways. I have my own thoughts. That’s what got them attracted to me.
And recently, I had a new member to my family of sisters. She isn’t my neighbour or someone I just met. She is someone I already met but couldn’t get close with because of barriers like being in separate classes. Remember I told you about school number eleven? I missed a soul best friend there. We didn’t hear from each other for five whole years. I think we even forgot about each other. But when we were back at school, whilst sitting with our respective gangs, we’d always know something was missing and would always look over at each other. We always used to exchange this bright smile whenever we saw each other and the handful of times we actually exchanged a few words, we knew we were supposed to spend time more. But sadly, we didn’t.
But that didn’t mean we have lost.
Because we finally found each other around New Year. Thank you Google Plus!
I was blessed to recognise her profile and one small message of greeting from me progressed to mails that has now morphed into endless Whatsapp chats that we can’t get enough of. I love doing the same thing to my other sisters. You may wonder why don’t make phone calls. Because as we are all writers, we connect through our area of expertise a lot. Emails and chats are all part of it and it’s a way to express our emotions in a more sophisticated and fluid way. We love doing that. And another reason is that you can always go back and admire the way we talk, the usage of language and the love that strings all the words together.
We love Harry Potter. We love JK Rowling. We are sceptic about the Twilight Franchise. We love sending each other pdf files. We love, no scratch that, are crazy about F.R.I.E.N.D.S. We love romance novels. We love recommending books to each other. We fan ourselves over irresistible male characters. We love discussing a whole variety of topics. We love each other’s views. We love it when they all go in synch. We never misunderstand each other. We never fight as a result. We express our love for one another so constantly we’re not even aware we’re doing it. We support each other’s writing immensely and if one of us slack or abandon our babies, we make sure to kick their asses for it.
We’re soul sisters for the rest of eternity.